The Ageing Rockstar and I are sitting in bed, reading about vital matters on our respective laptops. As i am sure many of you find, the screen of the person next to you is infinitely more interesting than the one in front of you. rather like the old days when travelling on the tube the person next to you has a more interesting newspaper, even though it is one that your political sensibilities would prevent you from buying. 

The Ageing Rockstar is looking at a map. My lust for travel is ignited and i crane my neck to see where he might be thinking of whisking me away to.


“Leominster?” I cry, “what’s in Leominster?”

Let me give you a clue, dear reader. It begins with G. And has strings.

But this is no ordinary guitar. It is a peculiar leaning over guitar. 

“You can’t buy that!” I shriek, “its all wonky!”

“They are supposed to be like that,” the Ageing Rockstar reassures me.

“But it won’t hang on the wall properly with all the normal un-wonky guitars. And everyone will lean over when they look at it and then the house will fall over…” I have to admit I was rather warning to my theme, at the expense of adherence to the laws of physics. A house falling over from diagonal guitar-viewing would be a first.

“I’m not going to buy it anyway,” the Ageing Rockstar sighs, “I’m just looking.”

I have heard this before, usually before a guitar-shaped parcel arrives in the post with some sob story about it being a rescue guitar that no-one wants. a wonky guitar would make the sob story much easier.

We go back to our reading.

“Where is Car-Lissel?” asks the Ageing Rockstar. I realise that he is winding me up by pretending that we are about to venture up to Carlisle to purchase a wonky guitar. I do not rise to the bait.

the ‘reading over the shoulder’ habit appears to be continuing. Indeed as I type this, the Ageing Rockstar is peering over my shoulder. i think he feels he needs to keep an eye on what is being released into cyberspace to minimise the damage to his street-cred. My last post had been out in the world for some time before he managed to read it, due to the fact that he was rather obsessively looking at a thing called a Neo Clone on eBay. I hope i am not going to be cloned. one of me is plenty.

on closer inspection the wonky guitar appears to have some things called 'Epiphone Alnico Classic Humbuckers' which apparantly give it a "Classic biting tone with warm, fat mids". rather like myself.


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